Rule Number One

Tyler Durden once said, “The first rule of Fight Club is you never talk about Fight Club”.

There are a lot of “Number One” rules in life or “Golden Rules” or whatever you want to call them. I once read an article by a reporter for CBS, whose name I can’t seem to remember but anyway, in his article about reporting from war zones across the world he said that the number one rule is to “always have a camera with you”. No matter what, whenever you think things will be calm or that you wont be needing it, you undoubtedly will be kicking yourself as you watch something amazing or horrific happen before of your eyes and there you will stand with no way to capture it and share it with the world.

For however many months I have been fighting over here with these idiots, I have always done a very good job of always carrying my camera with me and I have been able to snap some pretty good pictures and get some fairly good footage. I also have one rule for myself, never film during a fire fight; Ever. That’s what CNN is for.

Despite our best efforts there will most always be that one time when we break the “number one” rule and we are left kicking our self for it. That day for me was yesterday.

During our usual rotation out at the Patrol Base we were called out to investigate some vehicles that had been spotted with passengers outside wearing ski mask and carrying weapons. Air support comes on the scene and just like a high speed chase in Los Angeles there was no where for these fools to run. They drove around in circles trying to act cool and innocent, they got out went in a house changed clothes got in separate cars and tried to split up and get away. Unfortunately for them my platoon equipped with two tanks and two gun trucks was arriving on the scene just then and there lives of death and destruction was quickly coming to an end.

We knew they were armed heavily so we were expecting a fight. Like a hostage negotiation scene from a movie the interrupter was on the bullhorn calling out for them to exit the vehicles with their hands empty and raised or be met by a hail of gunfire. For a tense moment the demands went unanswered. That’s when I fired a few well placed shots in the dirt near and their windows and they realized the gig was up and it was time for them to surrender.

They came out hands up and were met by myself a few fellow dismounts on the ground where we began searching them and their cars. The fighters were all unarmed when they exited the cars but once in the cars we found several AK-47’s, a 9mm Pistol, a PKC automatic machine gun all fully loaded and several large knives and a hand grenade.

But this isn’t when I wish I had my camera which I left sitting next to a note that said “DON’T FORGET CAMERA” on a hot pink sticky note back at my CHU. After cuffing all the bad guys, getting all their weapons and searching for anything else that could be useful we walked them back a safe distance turned them around to face their expensive (Iraq standards that is.) Toyota Crowns (A V-6 Toyota Camry) that had been imported to them. At that time my roommate threw an incendiary grenade into the seats of the cars setting them all a blaze. And while he sprinted back to our vehicles we began spraying down their cars with a full barrage of bullets. Every machine gun we had riddled holes through their cars and the bad guys just sat there and watched as it all burned away.

Even for those of you out there who aren’t gun enthusiast, there are few better ways to relieve some stress than shooting up a insurgents car with a fully automatic weapon.

And as we rode back to the Patrol Base with the sun setting and thick black smoke billowing into the sky from three burning cars, I thought to myself, I am such an idiot for forgetting my camera.

[Insert really cool picture here]